NOT / /\ RED RAG BRITAIN'S ONLY NEWSPAPER december 25th 1982- happy Saturday x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x TODAY'S WEATHER IN BRIEF - Moscow - new regime brings hottest Christmas for 100 yrs - Andropov proclaims success for 5 week plan. Algiers - Snow and Hail - Gadafi claims algerians stole new weather-control technology. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x EDITORIAL It has come to our attention that there is not yet any copy at all for the next red rag; it is our experience that you only send us copy when someone insults you or questions the democracy of your organisation, so, dear anarchists, you're authoritarian! communists, don't you realise you're just a front for the Labour Party, ecology party, just a front for the SDP. labour party, don't you realise that the emancipation of the working class is the task of that class alone. SWP - wanna buy a cheap ice pick? Trades Council, you're just a front for the labour party. The Burghfield Peace camp started a fight in the Cunning Man last week. Pagans Against Nukes are a tool of the Vatican. Animal Liberation Front - can we have our Turkey back please? (as the Turkish People said to the govt.) GaySoc - you miserable bunch Legalise Cannabis Campaign - how did the fingerprinting of those questionnaires go? Womens' Centre, why be a wife? BANC - we're not going to insult you as you send far too much copy anyway. Red Rag - purveyors of fine toilet for the more discerning squat. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x REAL EVENT GUIDE Sat Jan. 15 1983 - Friends of Shehnaz Sheikh - march through Reading to help defend Shehnaz from deportation x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x Christmas - the time of year when you see people you haven't seen all year, and realise why. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x A MOST BORING HEWS ITEM Britain's only newspaper interviewed a spokesperson from the Burghfield Peace Campaign who are currently holding a fast outside the Royal Ordinance Factory at Burghfield. 25/12/82. r.r. How many of you are taking part in the fast? s.p. About 20 or so. r.r. Where are you actually holding the fast? s.p. Most fasters are sat at a brazier by the back gate of the factory, but there is continuous presence at the front, entrance and we've got a portacabin for shelter. r.r. Have you had a lot of support? s.p. Yes, we've had a steady stream of visitors, and lots of support from passing cars. r.r. What about madia coverage? s.p. We've been interviewed by the Post and Chronicle, Thames and TVS television and Radio 210. On the other hand the BBC said it a was the most boring news item they'd ever heard. We said the person in question was the most cynical person we'd ever spoken to. r.r. What did you have for Christmas dinner? s.p. A cup of hot water. r.r. What about the vegetarians? s.p. Ecologically and Ideologically sound water. r.r. Fluoride Free? s.p. Oh No! Blast! - The fasters will be there 'til midnight on Tuesday pointing out the connections between Arms spending and world hunger. They are also raising funds for War on Want and any donations or support are of course welcome. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x credits - Paper - Acorn Books (add Rizla) - Editors - Droucho, Varpo Chico, Zeppo and Karl - duplicated by Ashtaroth Beelzebub and 999,999,999 servitors and knights on horseback, thru someone's flat, making tea: for a sick horse Thanx man. - Artwork - Renoir and Beethoven x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x Dinosaur Race by Poe It's Christmas morning in Reading And Gran has given me this year's pair of socks. She's had her sixth after dinner sherry and is passed out in a chair. Mother is complaining about her snorin', brushing away a strand of recently dyed hair. Dad's mesmerized in frqnt of the telly with a newspaper on his lap talking about the state of his head. Openin' another bottle of sherry. My nephews are raidin' the fridge and fighting over presents. And the cat next door knocked off a dustbin lid As it rattles loudly on a concrete floor Today is Christmas Shit I'm bored. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x RED RAG'S FAMOUS GOING OUT GUIDE Sat Dec 25 STAY IN. It's even worse outside. There's nothing to do at all. The cinemas are closed, the pubs are shut, there are no cars on the road, no Bingo, nothing at the Hexagon, no football. Hey it sounds like after the revolution, no entertainments to consume. We'll have to make our own fun. We'll have to talk to people, the neighbours even. Go for a walk. Look at the trees. Borrow your neighbours dog, you'll feel less conspicuous in the park. Go out this evening to look at the stars. Scary isn't it? Are you depressed because no-one will take your money? Visit friends, visit enemies you've got more to say to them. No work today, can you still remember how to some thing useful? Remember everyday life is for people who can't handle reality. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x RED RAG'S CHRISTMAS T. V. GUIDE The Revolution will not be televised x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x advert Ana still needs a room with sunshine phone 666681 x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x This issue of red rag is brought to you by those few members of the red rag collective whose revolutionary commitment extends to not observing bourgeois christian festivals. It is being distributed more by luck than judgement and will undoubtedly become a rare collectors item. It is printed at a secret location and comes to you by the magic of mimeo. It is being paid for by any means possible which means you lot have got to send cheques, giros used fivers etc. to the rag c/o Acorn, 17 Chatham street. The last cheque we wrote bounced, and our bank manager wants to see us to discuss the conduct of our account. This time we really do need money, or all rags will look like this. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x Red rag competition time. Use this space to write your contribution for the next rag - deadline thurs 6th Jan. Publication almost guaranteed. This is not real life, only a poor quality spectacle. x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x --- $Id: //info.ravenbrook.com/user/ndl/readings-only-newspaper/issue/1982/1982-12-25.txt#4 $